Hipless
Hipless
Seven weeks ago I had my right hip replaced due to arthritis. Before surgery I had heard story after story about how easy it was and saw many folks in our church have surgery and do very well in recovery. One young lady, a little younger than I am, went in to surgery and the next week or so was running around the church as if nothing happened. Another young lady, a little older than I am, had hip surgery on a Thursday, I believe, and was in church on Sunday. The amount of pressure those two ladies placed upon my shoulders was immense. I simply could not be the wimp who struggled with recovery. God blessed, and I came out of surgery with no pain, no struggles, and a quick recovery. All that worry about looking like a wimp was for nothing. Fast forward six weeks and I went in to have my left hip replaced. No worries. I didn’t really bother to clear my schedule too much and I looked forward to having all this behind me. Ouch. This one hurt. It still hurts. By the time I get out of bed, shower, and dress I am ready to go back to bed. I try not to take pain pills so that I can drive to work but by the time a drag my rear end up to my office and plop in my chair I am ready to take a nap. I do my best to study or write something in this blog that makes sense and that may help someone but often I spend more time fighting to keep my eyes open than I do reading. Here is my advice...I got nothing, one hurt and one didn’t. One I felt tough and could take on both ladies in their recovery, the other one I thought I might cry putting on my underpants this morning. No life lessons in any of that just yet.
I will share, though, one long night I had last week. For some reason, sleep would not come. I would read a little, studied Hebrews 3 for a while, day dreamed for a long time, but sleep would not come. Now, sometimes that happens and it just seems like you are awake all night. You actually have slept a little in between your wake ups. But this night I was wide awake until 5:30 when I dosed off for about a half hour. What made this worse was that I cannot sleep on my side yet. I am forced to sleep on my back. Sleeping on my stomach was eliminated many pounds ago. My big moves are that I can I cross my hands across my chest like I am in a coffin or if can I lay them at my side like a robot. On nights you cannot sleep, it is like a prison. I thought about going to my recliner but I am basically in the same position. I used to think that there was nothing worse than tossing and turning all night...but now I know different. But, what happened that night as I had to just lay still was that God brought peace and calmness. Don’t get me wrong, it was one very long night, but God gave me time to study for my next message, he brought people to my mind to pray for, and he brought back passages from the Psalms when the writers spoke about difficult nights. While I wanted to sleep, God gave me the grace to simply spend some time with him. When I found myself declaring that I had to turn off my Kindle and do my best to sleep, he took away the frustration of not sleeping, and replaced it with times of useful meditation. When the aching in my hip kept me awake, he filled my mind with good thoughts that distracted me from the aching.
That night was a good reminder of the good gifts that God brings. Peace in the midst of storms. Calmness in the midst of frustration. Peace that passes all understanding. What I learned that night was how much I struggle against the gifts of God. I kept working hard to find sleep. I kept trying to distract myself from the gift of stillness and peace that God was bringing me that night. I found myself thinking about how the steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord and how often I fail to walk in those steps. It is in those steps that so many of God’s blessings are found. After a while, I realized that night that there was nothing I could do. I simply just laid there and God blessed. God brings appointments in our lives every day. Those appointments are full of his blessings. We need to learn to go down those paths and to trust the Lord enough to allow him to bless us. Those are not delays in our lives but opportunities to be blessed by him.
Seven weeks ago I had my right hip replaced due to arthritis. Before surgery I had heard story after story about how easy it was and saw many folks in our church have surgery and do very well in recovery. One young lady, a little younger than I am, went in to surgery and the next week or so was running around the church as if nothing happened. Another young lady, a little older than I am, had hip surgery on a Thursday, I believe, and was in church on Sunday. The amount of pressure those two ladies placed upon my shoulders was immense. I simply could not be the wimp who struggled with recovery. God blessed, and I came out of surgery with no pain, no struggles, and a quick recovery. All that worry about looking like a wimp was for nothing. Fast forward six weeks and I went in to have my left hip replaced. No worries. I didn’t really bother to clear my schedule too much and I looked forward to having all this behind me. Ouch. This one hurt. It still hurts. By the time I get out of bed, shower, and dress I am ready to go back to bed. I try not to take pain pills so that I can drive to work but by the time a drag my rear end up to my office and plop in my chair I am ready to take a nap. I do my best to study or write something in this blog that makes sense and that may help someone but often I spend more time fighting to keep my eyes open than I do reading. Here is my advice...I got nothing, one hurt and one didn’t. One I felt tough and could take on both ladies in their recovery, the other one I thought I might cry putting on my underpants this morning. No life lessons in any of that just yet.
I will share, though, one long night I had last week. For some reason, sleep would not come. I would read a little, studied Hebrews 3 for a while, day dreamed for a long time, but sleep would not come. Now, sometimes that happens and it just seems like you are awake all night. You actually have slept a little in between your wake ups. But this night I was wide awake until 5:30 when I dosed off for about a half hour. What made this worse was that I cannot sleep on my side yet. I am forced to sleep on my back. Sleeping on my stomach was eliminated many pounds ago. My big moves are that I can I cross my hands across my chest like I am in a coffin or if can I lay them at my side like a robot. On nights you cannot sleep, it is like a prison. I thought about going to my recliner but I am basically in the same position. I used to think that there was nothing worse than tossing and turning all night...but now I know different. But, what happened that night as I had to just lay still was that God brought peace and calmness. Don’t get me wrong, it was one very long night, but God gave me time to study for my next message, he brought people to my mind to pray for, and he brought back passages from the Psalms when the writers spoke about difficult nights. While I wanted to sleep, God gave me the grace to simply spend some time with him. When I found myself declaring that I had to turn off my Kindle and do my best to sleep, he took away the frustration of not sleeping, and replaced it with times of useful meditation. When the aching in my hip kept me awake, he filled my mind with good thoughts that distracted me from the aching.
That night was a good reminder of the good gifts that God brings. Peace in the midst of storms. Calmness in the midst of frustration. Peace that passes all understanding. What I learned that night was how much I struggle against the gifts of God. I kept working hard to find sleep. I kept trying to distract myself from the gift of stillness and peace that God was bringing me that night. I found myself thinking about how the steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord and how often I fail to walk in those steps. It is in those steps that so many of God’s blessings are found. After a while, I realized that night that there was nothing I could do. I simply just laid there and God blessed. God brings appointments in our lives every day. Those appointments are full of his blessings. We need to learn to go down those paths and to trust the Lord enough to allow him to bless us. Those are not delays in our lives but opportunities to be blessed by him.
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